Why I kinda hate valentine’s day

I’m a romantic at heart, but Valentine’s Day? Not for me. There are a few reasons—some personal, some bigger-picture.

My Love-Hate Relationship with Valentine’s Day

Me and a mammoth box of valentine’s day cards I’d designed!

In what feels like a past life (before kids!), I designed cards and prints under Witty Hearts. I loved creating meaningful ways to say “I care,” and my business did ok but the Valentine’s Day rush was overwhelming. Every year, I’d burn out, exhausted by the pressure to make this one day the ultimate expression of love. But why should one day matter more than the rest? I tell my friends and family I love them all the time—I hope they’re not tired of hearing it!

Beyond personal experience, Valentine’s Day has long been co-opted by advertisers as a way to make us buy love. While things are slowly shifting, the dominant message still prioritises romantic love above all else. But love comes in so many forms! From friendships to family support, from community connections to self-love—these relationships bring meaning and joy to our lives, and they deserve to be celebrated too.

The Pressure of "The One"

There’s also the unrealistic expectation that one person should be your everything. I say this as someone who is incredibly lucky to be married to a wonderful partner who is also one of my best friends. But even in the healthiest relationships, it’s important to find support, inspiration, and love in multiple places.

And then there’s self-love—where’s the dedicated day for that? Learning to accept and celebrate myself has been a journey. As I’ve grown older, I’ve let go of worrying about what others think. My self-love is a work in progress, but I know I’m getting there. My sessions in somatic movement with Rakhi have been a huge support in this, and I’ll definitely be sharing more about that!

Love That Feels Authentic

My latest love story has been my experimentation with different sari drapes

For me, love is about showing up every day—not just on a date in February dictated by marketing teams. Love is in the small moments, in the way we build community, and in how we express ourselves—whether that’s through words, actions, or even the clothes we wear.

If you’re feeling the pressure of Valentine’s Day, maybe take a step back and think about what love looks like for you. And if self-expression is part of that journey, I’d love to help you embrace it through sustainable style coaching. Because feeling good in your own skin—on your own terms—is something worth celebrating all year round.